Friday, December 30, 2005

Bruin Boozer Misses Bowl

As if this couldn't be more obvious during the holiday season, drinking & driving don't really mix. Just ask UCLA placekicker Justin Medlock, who was charged with felony driving under the influence of alcohol in connection with a Dec. 10 accident in which a woman was seriously injured.

The Los Angeles County district attorney's office made the announcement Friday, while the Bruins were playing Northwestern in the Sun Bowl at El Paso, Tex. Medlock, who scored 89 points this season, didn't play, having been suspended indefinitely a day after the accident.

The 22-year-old junior was charged with one count each of DUI causing injury and driving with .08 percent blood alcohol causing injury. Each of the counts alleged that Medlock had caused great bodily injury to 20-year-old Hannah Jun, a member of the UCLA golf team. Authorities said the Jun's injuries included a fractured vertebra in her neck.

Medlock is scheduled to be arraigned Tuesday in Inglewood Superior Court. His kicking days may be over for the Bruins, because if he's convicted, he faces a possible maximum state prison term of six years.

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Baseball Badness

MNFSpring Training is only a mere three months away, but we can turn our attention to the national pastime thanks in part to guys like former stud reliever Jeff Reardon and juice monkey Rafael Palmeiro. If you’ve been living in a cave for the past day, or you failed to pay your cable bill, Reardon was arrested on Monday for knocking off a jewelry store in Palm Beach Gardens, Florida.

Reardon walked into Hamilton Jewelers at the Gardens Mall on Monday and handed an employee a note saying he had a gun and the store was being robbed, police said. The 50-year old former pitcher, who ranks sixth all time in saves, was picked up by police at a nearby restaurant. An undisclosed amount of cash was recovered, but no weapon was found on Reardon.

Reardon's attorney, Mitchell Beers, said the former pitcher had a 20-year-old son who died of a drug overdose in February 2004, which has been "very difficult for him and his family," and has been on medication for depression. Reardon, who is married and has two other children, also underwent heart angioplasty last week and has been taking medication for that.

It’s not clear if Reardon was suffering from financial issues. He earned over $11 million during a major league career spent playing for the New York Mets, Montreal Expos, Minnesota Twins, Boston Red Sox, Atlanta Braves, Cincinnati Reds and New York Yankees.

Palmeiro broke his silence on his steroid suspension in a New York Times interview published on Wednesday. Palmeiro doesn’t fess up, but he does admit to being "careless, stupid and naive." He does however continue to point the finger at Miguel Tejada.

"I wish I could pinpoint exactly what happened," said Palmeiro. "I would think it was the B-12. I'm not certain of that, I can't prove it."

The B-12 he’s referring to is the liquid vitamin that he received from Tejada while the two played together in Baltimore.

"I wish I could have turned in the vial for testing," Palmeiro. "But when I found out, it was long gone and I couldn't come up with it. If something happened that I'm not aware of, an intentional act by someone else, I don't know. I can't rule out anything."

Palmeiro may not have broken any code for cheating, but he certainly did by ratting on Tejada. Had the two opposed each other in an upcoming game, Tejada may have lobbied to pitch for an inning to deal with the situation.

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

El is for Long Distance

So Michael Vick (aka Ron Mexico) isn’t the only NFL’er required to mentor his little brother on the path of the righteous. Marcus Randle El, little brother of Pittsburgh Steelers wide out Antwaan Randle El was charged with misdemeanor battery on Tuesday after the police said the University of Wisconsin receiver smacked teammate Nick Sutton in the mug with a cell phone.

Little Randle El was also charged with a misdemeanor bail violation, associated with a shoving match with his girlfriend.

Big Randle El will need to take little bro under his wing, because the U of W certainly isn’t. after initially suspending him, Little Randle El was reinstated in preparation for, you guessed it, the teams upcoming bowl game. The Badgers play on January 2nd in the Capital One Bowl against Auburn.

what we want to know is, why a cell phone? Was his handbag in the car?

Monday, December 26, 2005

MNF goes AWOL tonight

MNFABC is pulling the plug on what was a mainstay of Americana tonight as Monday Night Football will be pulled from the primetime lineup after tonight's Pats - Jets game. The show will be moved over to ESPN next season, after a 35 year run on one of the original big three networks.

Who's to blame for this disaster? Chalk it up to all involved. ABC was responsible for promoting the same teams over and over (how many times have the Patriots played on MNF over the last four years), while fans want to see good football games. Take tonight broadcast as an example. Nobody wants to see the Jets get it handed to them, so the finale is already primed to be a stinker.

Also throw blame at the league for failing to a) setup intriguing matchups, and b) continuing to maintain their archane broadcasting rules. If a team doesn't sellout their game, local broadcasts are blacked out. Brilliant marketing tactics there. Let's promote our sport by making it elitist.

And finally, blame it on the fans. Television viewers are fickle, but the lack of loyalty is simply unacceptable. So what if you're forced to work 12 hour days in order to make ends meet. Get in the office at 5 a.m. then! (Notice we accounted for your one hour commute). So what if you're already committing 3 to 10 hours of football viweing the day before (think three games, and pre and post game coverage). Where is the loyalty?

Don Meredith is supposed to be in attendance tonight, to, "...turn out the lights, the party's over. They say that all good things must end...."

Indeed.

Sunday, December 25, 2005

Talk about mailing it in

Chalk one up for the defenders of education and the pursuit of knowledge everywhere. University High School, a Miami based correspondence academy, won’t be “educating” some of our nations up and coming athletic talent. After drawing the ire of the NCAA, the school has decided to dismiss itself.

After the New York Times exposed the seedy underbelly of fast tracked education for at least 14 students who would go on to play Division I football, the school’s owner has decided to enjoy a permanent summer vacation.

The fact that the Miami-Dade prosecutor’s sudden interest in the school surely helped to expedite the decision by Stanley J. Simmons, the school’s owner.

"It's a disaster," Stanley J. Simmons told the Times. "I'm finishing up everything, and I'm going back into retirement."

Simmons founded the school in 2000, but sold it Michael R. Kinney over a year ago. Kinney had operated the school on Simmons behalf for several years prior to buying it and turning it into a hurdle clearing diploma machine. Simmons said Kinney defaulted on his monthly payment after the Times wrote about the school.

Simmons served 10 months in a federal prison camp after pleading guilty to conspiracy to commit mail fraud in 1989. He then sold the school to Kinney, who was charged with marijuana possession in 2003. Cheating? Drug use? Seems like the perfect curriculum for up and coming football talent.

Friday, December 23, 2005

Hanging chad, Olympic style?

So what's one person's vote worth these days? When you're talking about that vote deciding what city will host the Olympic games, it's getting up there (think billions of dollars). So when news surfaced Friday that a misplaced vote by an Olympic official may have cost London the 2012 Summer Games, the Brits have reason to chirp.

Alex Gilady said Friday a fellow International Olympic Committee member mistakenly voted for Paris rather than Madrid in July for the right to host the games. The amusing part is that nobody on the committee seems to know how the miscast vote would have affected the outcome of the vote. Or at least, nobody is fessing up.

"This is an assumption but a very serious assumption," Gilady said told The Associated Press.

The delegate is question is believed to be Lambis Nikolaou, president of the Greek Olympic Committee. He complained after the third round of voting he did not have time to register his choice, but his objection was dismissed and it was shown all votes had been cast. His secretary, who did not want to be identified, told the AP on Friday that Nikolaou was aware of the report but did not wish to comment.

Oddly enough, these people rehearsed the vote before casting the vote...and still botched it up! Even more odd is the fact that the vote in question may have come from a delegate of the country that hosted the last Summer games. Not sure if there's any relevance to that fact, but it just seems to make everything seem just a little bit fishy.

"We don't comment on IOC members' voting intentions and it is irrelevant," IOC spokeswoman Giselle Davies said.

Irrelevant! Rhythmic dance is irrelevant. Synchronized swimming is irrelevant. Getting a host vote right is a tad more relevant that these incompetents seem to think. But then again, the Olympics wouldn't be the Olympics without a little controversy.

Say Whu?

From the article "Detroit braces for barbs as Super Bowl comes to town "

By SARAH KARUSH, Associated Press Writer
Published December 22, 2005

"For a city widely associated with riots, murder and lousy weather, officials are hoping the Feb. 5 game at Ford Field will be their chance to impress a new image upon the influx of influential out-of-towners."

What, activities are being downgraded to muggings and petty larceny?

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Crime does pay (the lawyers)

Todd BertuzziWasn’t it only a few months ago when Vancouver Canucks Neanderthal Todd Bertuzzi was sobbing at the podium, apologizing for his disgraceful cheap shot on Colorado Avalanche forward Steve Moore? Bertuzzi wept like a little girl at a press conference to denounce his own despicable actions…or was that just a show, intended to lighten the impending punishment he was destined to receive? Gee, which one could it have been?

Bertuzzi pleaded guilty to assault in a Vancouver court, but he got off with probation and community service. He won the more important battle in a Denver court where Moore filed a civil suit against Bertuzzi. The judge in the latter case dismissed the case, citing that the argument would be better handled by a Canadian court, where the injury took place.

So Bertuzzi has sent his legal bill, amounting to $161,000 to Moore. State law requires that plaintiffs pay the defendants fees and costs when cases are dismissed before trial. Moore's attorney, Lee Foreman, said in a court filing that the defendants' dollar request was "overreaching and almost laughable" and contained numerous duplicate charges.

A lawyer over billing for services? What is this world coming to? The question that really begs asking is who deserves to be slapped more, Bertuzzi or his lawyer?

Der fix

What’s up with all the badness in soccer these days. This is the third straight post we’re making on soccer, which is a bit of a deviation from our charter, given that this is a sports blog, and soccer doesn’t really qualify as a real sport (does it?).

In any case, a German footballer was banned for eight months after being implicated in the match-fix scandal which has rocked the game in the country. Steffen Karl, 35, was kicked to the curb by the German football federation (DFB), having already been given a nine-month suspended prison sentence for his role in the affair.

The VfB Chemnitz player was the sixth and final cheater to be to be dealt with. Karl took an 8,000 euro bribe from a Croatian mob ring to tank a game in May of 2004. A pittance given that the mobsters were making millions on fixed games. The scandal has shamed Germany, especially given that the little old World Cup thing is right around the corner.

How do you even tank a soccer game? Those guys spend 50% of the game walking around and the other 50% flopping with their hands to the faces, faking injuries. Try faking an injury on the NFL or NHL.

Deadbeat hooligans. Who knew?

From the litigious misconduct file, a court in Gunther Hanses of Brussels, Belgium is seeking one million euros ($1.2 million) in damages from Belgium’s Racing Genk football club, after being beaten by two hooligans after the club won its first division title.

The two hooligans, who have not been named for legal reasons, beat the snot out of Hanses after the man tried to help a female colleague who was embroiled in an argument with the alleged butt kickers. The two were convicted after Hanses was left in a coma for a week and sustained injuries that are still affecting the 28-year-old man.

Problem is, the two hooligans are unemployed (unlike most heathens) and broke, therefore they have nothing to collect on. Team Genk (please don’t ask us what a Genk is) is trying to fend off a claim for the cash.

"We are very happy with the severity of the rulings, but we should not have to pay for something which was not our fault," team spokesman Eric Gerits said.
Note to self: Only pick fights with suits or well dressed BMW owners. They’ll be good for the tab.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

No really, the Romans did it all the time

Paolo Di CanioItalian soccer player Paolo Di Canio was suspended for Lazio's Serie A match against Lecce on Wednesday and fined 7000 pounds after he busted out a Nazi salute to fans.
He saluted his fans the same way during a Rome derby last season, and at Livorno last week, and has insisted his gesture is a greeting which dates back to ancient Rome.

"I will always salute that way because it gives me a sense of belonging to my people," he said recently.

Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi defended Di Canio on Wednesday, saying he was not a fascist. "Di Canio is an exhibitionist. His salute didn't have any significance. He's a good lad."

Mama Mia! These guys don't know when to quit do they. Di Canio lablled his ban "unjust" and insisted his salute had "nothing to do with any political ideologies." This guys doesn't get the point does he.

So the next time you feel like conveying a symbolism of Italian pride, click those boots together before whipping out the ole "Heil Hitler" and tell em Paolo sent you. And can someone please explain what "Assitalia" is (see photo)? On second thought, never mind.

Fault! Puerta

Not that anyone actually follows tennis, but hey it's good filler. And when was the last time you heard a tennis player receiving an 8-year suspension for doping? Argentine Mariano Puerta received the ban on Tuesday for a second doping offense.

A three-man International Tennis Federation tribunal said the drug apparently came from effortil, a medication Puerta's wife takes for hypertension. Puerta reached teh finals of last year's French Open, but his results will be nullified for the infraction.

"I find it extraordinary that it could ever be thought satisfactory that a person's livelihood can be terminated in circumstances such as these," Puerta said in a statement.

We find it extraoridinary that anyone would consider it ok to cheat because their income pays the bills. Rules? We don't need no stinking rules. Well, Puerta is Argentinian. That being the same country that gave us Diego Maradona, the soccer player who played his entire career higher than a kite.

Besides having to repay the prize money he won at the French Open, Puerta will be foced to relinquich his titles and ranking points won after Roland Garros. He is currently ranked No. 12 on the ATP Tour. Since the French Open, Puerta has earned about $330,000 in prize money.

"You're dealing with somebody who's tested positive twice in less than two years and clearly doesn't think the rules apply to him," World Anti-Doping Agency chief Dick Pound said.

Not to digress, but we're thinking Mr. Pound missed his calling in the adult film industry.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

No Suds for Jets-Pats

Alcohol won't be sold during Monday night's game between the Jets and Patriots at the Meadowlands in an attempt to keep rowdy fans from acting like New Yorkers.

The ban comes after nine fans were arrested during the Jets-Saints game Nov. 27. One man was charged with stabbing two fans in a restroom, and a state trooper broke his leg while trying to eject a fan who reportedly threw a beer bottle.

"It's for precautionary reasons, to provide for the safety and comfort of our fans," said Jets spokesman Ron Colangelo.

Better yet, keep the "fans" from stabbing each other. Perhaps they could sell tickets to Steelers fans. They seem to be good for road games en mass.

Tice doesn't like scalping

So Minnesota Vikings head coach Mike Tice thinks scalping is bad. Huh?

Tice told the Star Tribune of Minneapolis, Minn., that he was upset with the number of Steelers fans that occupied seats at the Metrodome on Sunday, estimating their numbers at 15,000 to 20,000.

"It confuses me, I guess," Tice told the newspaper. "Maybe they're not really diehard season-ticket holders or maybe they needed the money for Christmas presents. I don't know. One of the two."

Tice, you may recall, was fined $100,000 by the NFL in June for scalping his Super Bowl tickets.

The Vikings lost 18-3 to the Steelers on Sunday, and according to Tice, part of the loss was attributed to the large number of Steeler fans in attendance. Couldn't have had anything to do with the fact the Steelers are better team.

Roenick "Disrespected"

LA Kings forward Jeremy Roenick unleashed his wrath on USA Hockey officals on Tuesday for his Olympic snubbing.

"To not have the opportunity to go back one more time and try and win the gold is obviously, in my opinion, very disrespectful," said Roenick. "They can beat me down and say I'm over the hill or say that I don't have it anymore, but to me I know that I do."

Perhaps it has to do with the fact that USA Hockey hasn't won squat when represented by you Jeremy?

"I'm one of the guys that have gotten the USA to where it is today," added the 36-year-old winger added.

Yeah, you got that right.

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Welcome to the internet's newest (and most worthless) blog. World Chumps is here to call out all that is, well, moronic in the world of sports. If you pay attention, there's material in bushells out there...and we'll uncover it all. So bookmark this site, frequent us often and enjoy the ride.

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