Thursday, April 20, 2006

MLB Drops the Gloves

Major League Baseball finally took action against Barry Bonds on Wednesday. After a grand jury investigation, a possible grand jury indictment for perjury, and a tell-all book that has exposed Bonds as a roid-a-holic, the league acted swiftly, slapping Bonds with a $5,000 fine for wearing non-league approved wristbands.

Bob Watson, baseball's vice president for on-field operations, announced the ruling, but added that Bonds has already appealed. The league has had all it can stand, and it can’t stands no more.

"It probably will go to an arbitrator," Watson said.

Watson and other league officials were patting themselves on the back for taking such decisive action and hitting this epidemic squarely at the root.

Bonds was not in the lineup on Wednesday night. Apparently he was too distraught with the penalty to take the field as the Giants squared off with the Arizona Diamondbacks in Phoenix.

In related news, junkies around the globe have adopted a new wristband fashion craze. The elastic terry-cloth garments are not only fashionable, but functional. They come in a variety of colors and they easily camouflage track marks.

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